The heavy Phone

Well, today was one of those rainey days, that you just want to stay in bed. I've been down alot today but I finally picked up the phone and called a AA friend of mine, and she told me " Gail the great thing about life is that we can start our day over again". I put my belief in a power greater then myself, My Higher Power (God) as you choose to see it.Early soberity is very up and down. Physically and Mentally you heal, Emotionally it's a DAY to DAY personal program. The hardest thing as a acholic is thinking about yourself and doing for yourself in a healthy way. Your whole way of life changes , from top to bottom, It is so hard to explain the feelings you feel sometimes. Being Drunk you feel , but don't understand. That sounds weird but I know some of you will understand that. I wish I would have worked the program years ago. But then you know wishing is only for people who have unforfilled dreams, that are to weak to make them realitiy. Realitiy is a scarey word for someone who was in the dark fpr years not by choice but by sickness. One of the hardest things to do , is do it for yourself. ( To put the feeling of some people you love second) that sounds cruel but it does make sense when you think about it at times. I know my life is going to get better, it is going to take time. Another thing drunks don't have patiences, (everything must be now) that is what we are used to. (doing what we what when we want it no madder who we steppped on in our way) You learn that isn't the right way of life. Alcohol is Cunning, Powerful, and disructive. I have to go to a meeting will write more later. G/B  Gail